It is Why She Spared Him
by Lady Cailan
Summary: Submitted to a kinkmeme/Friday the 13th challenge at Cheeky Monkeys.  Just Loghain and Natia - no real plot/all sexy time.  Rated "M" for a reason.


_I wrote this little thing as a response to __Tyanilth's Friday the 13__th__ /kink meme request at Cheeky Monkeys. If you are disturbed by sex, please don't read. ;) Otherwise enjoy – I guess. ;)_

_LCailan_

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It is Why She Spared Him

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In him she meets her equal - every time.

_It is why I spared him._

The thought rushes her mind - he rushes her mind - and everything stops. Everything halts as if he holds the essence of life.

He is strong, willful. He is by nature persuasive and convincing - even more than he knows.

_He has me, all of me. He's had me since Ostagar even though I didn't know it - I was too overcome with everything else to know it, but now I do._

A man with a strong sense of duty to home and country and a man of devastating, fierce loyalty. He does whatever he has to - holds nothing back. He is like her - he has seen pain and war and tears and rage. They together - and even apart - are linked by a painful past. They are kindred souls.

_It is why I spared him._

He is there in those secret places where memories and dark fantasy merge - even in places that don't exist - he overwhelms.

Always Loghain.

_And that is why I spared him._

She has trekked across Ferelden furiously destroying everything in her path - wringing pain out of others in repayment of the pain she has been through, striking down without mercy- each blow, each act of violence richly satisfying. Yes, she has trekked but not only to face the archdemon.

Always - he has been on her mind - Loghain the traitor. Loghain the betrayer.

_But he is not a traitor. He - like she - has only done what he believes is right. He has only followed his heart and his loyalties._

When the elven assassin ambushes her -and then begs for his life citing Loghain as the one who has hired him - she takes his life by her blade, takes it with white hot rage. But the rage is not toward the dead man but towards herself. For she does not hate Loghain the way the others do.

She is unable to ever hate him - for in him she sees herself.

And then in the end she faces him - faces those endless eyes. Eyes that reflect her own, speak to her in a way that no others ever have and ever will.

And she spares him. She sacrifices her familiarity and her friendships to save him - to keep him near. This one piece of herself that she cannot explain and yet at the same time cannot think to ever give up. She forces the warden taint on him - branding him the way she has been branded - creating yet another link between them. If only to keep him close - closer still.

She watches as Alistair - a man who loves her but does not understand the hard, dark, secret parts of her - runs from the room in despair. His hopes are dashed into a thousand pieces - all jagged sharp pieces that cut him to the quick.

But to her there is no other choice. A world without Loghain is not possible - not after facing him again after so long - and finding _here _is where she should have been all along.

And now - the end is near, their goal in sight. She knows all good things are fleeting - life has taught her that. If he is here now he may not be tomorrow - nothing may be here tomorrow.

But - all that doesn't matter because it is not _now._

_Now _is Loghain standing too far away from her, firelight flickering along the hard and lean planes of his body. A body she has fantasized about in the parts of her mind locked away from all others.

_Now _is uncontrollable passion - passion that overwhelms her so that there is nothing but this madness, this need for him - it is as if there has been nothing before him and there will be nothing _without _him. There is only his face, his lips, his fingers, his cock.

_Now _is Loghain who wordlessly reminds her of all the things they have already done. He reminds her of all the things she has not yet done but now that she knows him, now that he has her and he claims her and refuses to relinquish whatever magic he holds _over_ her - she wants to.

_Ancestors help her._

_Now _is this feeling of irrevocable certainty that her soul is complete for the first time since stumbling from the dark corners of dust town because he holds the finally piece - and always will.

He reaches, roughened hands pressing against her muscled yet still delicate thighs -pressing, branding, _and bruising_ as he shoves her up along the bed. She is ready for him - willing- and she opens to him shamelessly -wet and swollen. She knows what is coming - and he doesn't disappoint. It pushes into her, wet tongue against even wetter flesh- and she cries out because it is too good...it is too much - but never, ever enough. It thrusts into her - tirelessly, tantalizingly _expertly - _through her and it makes her weep because there has never been such pleasure, never such abandon as when he is like this with her.

His tongue delves deep and she can feel him – deeper, faster, and quicker - her body readies itself for the glorious release.

_Yesyesyesyesyesyes. Don't stop. Nevernevernever stop. Don't stop._

Her blood boils with desire. Her mind goes white hot and then all though is annihilated as she throws her head back in complete submission.

He bites down and she comes, shuddering against the bed as his fingers press even harder against her thighs holding her in place so he can finish what he has started and she begs him to stop but he will not - because he does nothing halfway.

Her eyes open, wild with desire and they meet his and she can hear him in her mind - he speaks to her.

_You are mine._

Yes, she is his. His completely, utterly, every time. Always.

Somehow there is more and she is against the wall - keening for him - needing him - and she reaches back gripping his ass so that he cannot get away - not even a chance. He is behind her - she feels him - hot, hard, ready, and naked.

There is no waiting - not now - not when the need is so frantic. He presses his heated body against hers and then inside her snapping his hips viciously -and is matched only by her own enthusiasm as she leans into him wanting more.

He plunders her. He pounds her. He bears down on her and drives into her. He _punishes _her.

Punishes her for forcing on him a taint he never wanted - for capturing his mind and his soul the way she had. Punishes her because if the taint flows in his blood and he knows it - then he wants to make sure she knows who she belongs to now.

She is his. His.

There is nothing but his labored grunting and her whimpers in time with each thrust - with each shove - on and on it goes. He is thick and full inside her and all she wants - all she craves - is release. The fulfillment of a need that never goes away so long as he is with her

She wants to come and he won't allow it. Not just yet - not until she is weeping with need.

_You think I am yours, do you? You think because you forced this destiny on me - that I am yours? Wrong -you are wrong - I am not yours. You are mine. Do you hear me you little bitch? .Mine. Do you want this? Do you want me to fuck you - do you want to come, my little bitch, do you?_

She cannot deny it - her body refuses her denial -only quivers for more.

_More. Yes More. Harder. Harder. Do it - do it harder._

She is so close she can taste it.

He drives into her wildly, clutching with abandon - hands reaching, gripping, and slipping as he incessantly fucks her.

_You love this, don't you? You love me fucking you?_

He does not have to ask, those words meaningless in the light of the way her body responds to his merciless assault. His hand snakes around her neck and he is pulling her back only so that his tongue can relish the sweaty salty skin there. He ravishes her mouth the way he had her pussy - as a famished man would his last meal.

Grunting he shoves against her - this time with more force - it is almost violence now but it is glorious, and she is delirious with it, with him. Yanking her hair back he breathes against her ear.

_Tell me. Tell me you want my cock inside you. Tell me! Tell me you love my cock inside you._

_She would have spoken had she the ability but everything he was doing to her, was her undoing and the friction of his most hardened part within her created the most delicious friction and she could only moan._

_Yesyesyes._

_I love it! I want it – oh – I need it. I love it. Loveit. Love you. Love you. Lovelovelove-_

_He shoves her forward against that sodden wall and she fells the contrast between the cool plaster and the heat of his hard body. He stops. She cries out in despair for if he stops now if he takes away this magic – she feels herself dying even at the thought._

_Oh please – please. Don't- don't stop. I am yours, I am. Yours always – even before I knew it I was yours. Fuck me. Fuckme._

_He drives forward with a cry and sinks his teeth into her shoulder and the pain is sharp but beautiful – stinging and yet she cannot get enough. She growls and shoves back wanting more, wanting everything, all he can give her. _

_He moves faster and faster._

_You are mine. Never will you forget me even when I am not here – never will you want another the way you want me._

_It is deep and quick and merciless and yet she groans for more, more…she loves this- loves that he is the only man who takes her this way, the only man she has ever known that refuses to allow her to dominate him. And to his will she would always submit. This was perfect – real – raw and primal. She belonged to him – his was her mind, her heart, her soul and her body. _

_Never. Never will I want another! You – I want you – take me, please take me and make me yours. Do what you want but don't stop this – oh please – it's too good. Yes._

_He is reaching for her, brushing aside sweaty hair, kissing her – it is brutal but she wants it. She always wants it. _

_Does my Natia want to come?_

It is a pant against her ear but it sends electric shocks through her already heated body, and it drives her closer and closer to the edge of an oblivion she cannot wait for. Oblivion that only his body, his cock, and his mouth can create.

_Yes, oh yes, make me come. Oh make me come. Make me…make me.._

And she cannot think any longer for with a knowing chuckle he thrusts into her one last time and she is coming – spinning out of control over the edge and she is falling and she doesn't care what happens now, she is only aware of the unbelievable pleasure that crashes into her body. Each wave leaves her breathless and the aftermath is simply more desire. She falls limp, his name on her lips and she is weeping from it. From him. From everything. He cradles her and whispers to her and kisses her and-

She is awake. Awake and alone in a room where he should have been – and _had_ been only the night before. She is breathless and wet – and her tears come unbidden. He is gone now – that part of her soul and all those things he could do to her with just a look and then a touch. He is gone, taken by the taint when he had drawn his sword to slay the demon.

He is gone. So is the oblivion he brought her. So is all hope – for she had placed it all in him. The man who had held her missing piece – the final part of her.

He had come and gone so quickly – for all good things were fleeting.

~Fin~


End file.
